Lent is a bit of a paradox: it is, on the one hand, a cyclical invitation "back to the center," back to harmony with God and with others, back to what is essential. At the same time, it is an invitation to venture forward, a pilgrimage through the shadows of Holy Week and the rebirth of Easter - in other words, an invitation to change. Today I found myself wondering about change, and how real change happens.
In an ancient story of the desert fathers, Abba Lot seeks the counsel of the older, wiser Abba Joseph. Abba Lot seeks something more in his life, but has hit a dead end: he does everything he can by way of prayer and good works, but senses that these things alone are not helping him on his spiritual pilgrimage. "What more can I do?" he asks the older man. The older man raises his hands skyward, and his fingers become like flame. And he says to the younger man, If you will, you can become all flame."
I confess: the image appeals to me. So does the response: " If you will, you can...." Which is to say, the answer to new life - to real change - always lies within. It's not "out there" in the externals of the moment. It is not, as Elijah discovered, in the earthquake, wind or fire. It is a matter of being still enough to pay attention to what is going on in our soul; still enough to what it is that our heart wills. What does your heart will? Listen well. If you follow, change will come, and with it, new life.
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